I spent July 4th weekend at a singles event and I had a revelation there. With the sun pounding on the boardwalk, the waves crashing on the shore, it occurred to me that all of life is a freak show. You know the kind you see in carnivals in the movies, with tattooed men and bearded ladies. There IS no normal...except in our own minds.
I quietly watched as single men and women drifted through the weekend, making the motions of people trying to connect but silently slipping right by each other like ships passing in the dead of night. There were grossly obese men who couldn't understand why thin, pretty women were passing them by. There were older plain women who were hurt that young attractive men did not want to date them. Everyone, even the most attractive and intelligent in the group, had something hanging over them - either physically or psychologically--what is known in the singles arena as "baggage." One attendee put it succinctly and effectively. "We are all broken toys," he said. And it reminded me of headless Barbie dolls and firetrucks missing a wheel. He was right.
What most impressed me about the weekend was the sad realization that , in spite of our own flaws, all of us--myself included--were walking around like we were the only ones in the room with no baggage whatsoever. We were the perfect toy in the brand new box, pristine, unopened, never drooled on or chewed. But I know better...and when you scratch beneath the surface, there was not a face in the crowd that could claim perfection, no matter how pretty or handsome, trim or fit, accomplished or intelligent they were.
A lady with facial hair, a man with missing teeth, a woman battling the memories of dealing with bulemia, a young mother with four children, a 75-year old set on finding a 35-year old...what a collection we were. And so, when approached by other "broken toys" we reared our heads, looked through them, or sat barely tolerating the other's advances. Some got downright insulted that the other dared try to engage. Is it fair? Is it nice? Certainly not. But it is human nature. A sad fact. We only see the other's flaws. Not our own.
Interesting post on online dating. I personally have found dating sites as good way to meet single professionals
Posted by: Ryan | July 08, 2009 at 01:57 AM