Joining the Thin Club

The Michigan 40

You've heard of the Freshman 15? 

Well, since I've moved to Michigan, I put on 40 pounds.  The sad fact is, I'm not alone.  I look around me in grocery stores, at the gym - everywhere - people here seem to be overweight - even obese.

After losing 90 lbs - watching the scale - and my wardrobe as they inflate - has been disheartening - to say the least.  I've been resistant to posting on my blog - so ashamed of gaining weight.  I wrote a book about the psychology of weight loss - and here I am gaining weight.  What's that about? So this week, after my husband gently reminded me that my belly was kind of preceding me - I finally heeded my own call to action.  I've taken control.

Step One - I stepped up my gym presence.  Even though I'm fat, working out makes me feel better.  I'm hoping I can break the cycle of feeling bad, eating, feeling worse, low energy and gym resistence.  Going to the gym makes me feel strong and healthy - even when there is a bit too much jiggle.

Step Two - I really tried to get to the root of what was eating ME - and only then did I step back and really thought about what I was eating.  This was probably the toughest step because it involved introspection, realizing that I was out of control, and determining that I want to be IN CONTROL.  I realized that in certain areas of my life I am not in control.  But it doesn't have to be that way with my waistline.  Now I'm in position to take my life back.  This is a whole blog post in itself.  I will follow up as I continue to explore.

Step Three - I acknowledged that although I love my husband, I have not been happy in my new life in Michigan.  That may or may not change.  But I don't have to be unhappy AND overweight.  It's kind of like wearing a big, fat sign - "I hate my life!"  And clearly, I'm not the only one - there are depressed people all over Michigan wearing the same sign.  It's a club I'd rather not join.  So I've ditched the sign.

So, here I am on day 3 of what will hopefully be the road to recovery.  I don't have a clearcut goal - other than wanting to ditch the Michigan 40 and feel better.  I'll be working through my issues - one pound at a time - and strengthening my body and my mind.  With help from above, hopefully I can tackle the challenges.

I guess the one upside about yo-yo dieting is that I know I can do it.  I've done it before!

My Life in 10 File Cabinet Drawers

As I prepare for my mondo move to Michigan - where I can't wait to join my husband, who has waited patiently to welcome me to my new home, I have begun the grunt work of sorting through my "stuff" and figuring out what to take and what to trash.

Since I have been operating a PR agency for over 20-years, that means lots and lots of files.  And since my business pre-dates the paperless office of today, lots of files means lots of paper.  Some of the papers are boring - old records of receivables, cash receipts, the kind of stuff my ex-husband who is a CPA, routinely kept in folders and envelopes.  Some are home-related - old floor plans, swatches of wallpaper and carpet.  And some are child-created - love notes, stories, letters from camp - my three prolific children - the youngest of whom is set to graduate high school today - certainly gave me enough to stock several file cabinets.

As I piece through each file before I send some to the dispose/shred pile and others to my new home, I realize that my entire life is contained in a row of metal cabinets.  Forget the pine box - bury me in a file cabinet.  Everything I ever did - clues to my existence as a rebellious teen through my college years as President of the Film Society to first job at Paramount Pictures Corporation to my married life and subsequent jobs.  My letters of recommendation supporting my ambitions (never realized) to go to law school, books and screenplays started but never finished (there were quite a few of those).  Awards I've won, campaigns I've run.  Research for the books I did complete and manage to publish - and article after article, photo after photo of me in every stage of MEdom. I never realized how many lives I've lived until I attacked those files. And my children - stories and cards they composed when they were so young that gave hints as to who they would grow into so many years later.

I woke up my hours-away-from-graduating senior with a story she wrote and illustrated in first grade, entitled, The Little Bear.  It's about a bear named Cottony who goes to school, makes cupcakes and encounters a "mean girl" on the bus.  He cries at the end because nobody likes him and his mommy assures him that he is liked - because SHE loves him.  And wouldn't you know it - just yesterday Casey and I had that discussion.  "You don't love me!" she cried.  I assured her, I do - SO much.  Precious and prescient is that special story.

Of course, now that society is essentially paperless, most of the papers in my file cabinets are meaningless - but sorting through the piles of paper, I've found some gems - more than enough to fill a time capsule - with treasures that my entire family can read, review and enjoy for years to come.

The book cover

Coming in July!