My apologies for keeping everyone hanging. A lot has happened in the past ten days. When I last blogged I was in early labor and things were progressing slowly. At one point I was walking around, barely feeling the contractions, so I decided to jump, figuring, maybe the motion would shake the babies down. A nurse came running into the room. "What did you do?" she asked me, alarmed. "I jumped," I explained. She told me to stop immediately. She saw on the monitor that Twin A was having "decelerations" - the heart rate dropping precipitously. "Besides," she admonished, "a woman nine months pregnant with twins should NOT be jumping."
The Obstetrician explained that the decelerations could mean that the umbilical cord was compressed. He said we would have to keep an eye on it. Needless to say, I stopped jumping.
I checked into Labor and Delivery and the pitocin drip started on Wednesday. Slowly, I began to lose track of time. I called Bonnie, our Doula, and she came with Jenice, her apprentice on Thursday night. She sat with me through the decision-making process. Together with the doctor, my team decided to bring the pitocin up to full speed, and rupture the membranes. I was no longer begging for pain. The contractions became unbearably strong and close together, although I still wasn't terribly dilated. I labored in every position possible, the Doulas pushing on my back and on my knees, but the baby's decellerations continued. Exhausted and wracked with pain that no deep breathing could ever alleviate, I begged the doctor for some relief and they started an epidural. As the epidural was being administered, I was warned that if I didn't stay still, I could cause complications in my spine. Staying still while my body ached made my memories of passing a kidney stone seem like a walk in the park.
After the epidural was administered, I fell asleep while the doctors and nurses monitored my contractions. When the doctor checked, as Thursday morphed into Friday, I was no further along and he was concerned because Baby A's heart rate kept fluctuating downward. At around 5 am, he turned on the light and spoke to D and me about doing a C-section, the procedure I wanted to avoid at all costs. But did I? When I thought of my poor baby trying to unsuccessfully make its way down the birth canal and possibly being damaged by my recalcitrance, the choice became obvious. And I appreciated being given the choice.
I said a small prayer in Hebrew that acknowledges that in the end G-d is in control of all medical situations and begs G-d to give the doctor the skills needed to successfully treat me. I was keenly aware that this was surgery and there are serious risks and downsides to every surgical procedure, so after I connected with G-d I felt better. I was wheeled into the operating room and prepped for the procedure. An anesthesiologist and nurse stood by to switch my medication. A gigantic drape separated me from the rest of the universe. Bonnie, my Doula, sat next to me and held my hand. D watched from afar.
I focused on trying to breath. My body was shuddering. Even though I didn't feel anything, I felt pressure and it was suffocating. Then I heard a baby cry. Baby A had been extracted, the umbilical chord wrapped around his neck - twice. The OB went diving into me for Baby B but couldn't find his head. He pulled him out by his bottom - a Cesarean breech delivery. A second baby's cry joined the cacophony of wails. Bonnie wiped my tears away. Our baby boys were born safe and healthy. D clutched them to his scrubs and brought them over to me. "They look just like the million ultrasounds," I said. When they heard my voice, both babies stopped crying.
"They know your voice," Bonnie smiled at me.
I thought about the dreaded C-section and the hours and hours of pitocin-induced labor. It certainly wasn't what I would have chosen. Did the induction keep my cervix from dilating? Had I waited another week or two would the experience have been more natural? Would Baby A have made it through a natural delivery. No, it wasn't what I would have chosen, but ultimately, I'm convinced that I had very little control over the situation - and in the end, everything that happened was the way it had to be.
Our little miracles--our baby boys--were born on February 15 at 6:46 and 6:48 am at 5 lbs, 6 oz and 4 lbs 15 oz.
Sorry you suffered a c section Judy. I hope by now the pain is bearable. I know you are overjoyed at your results! As far as operations go, besides 4 sections I've had a few~ 5 to be exact;lapband,hysterectomy,tubal ligation, knee surgery,and uterine embolization. Most involved terrible pain but I never associated the word 'dreaded' when it came to the c sections because I knew it was all a blessed process and I respected that. It really bothers me that you aren't more humble about this miracle you have been handed. May God help you in the days and years ahead.
Posted by: Devorah Malek | 02/26/2013 at 12:15 AM
I'm so glad that you and the babies are ok. David too!
Posted by: E | 02/26/2013 at 12:35 AM
Mazal Tov! I never wanted a c-section and I ended up with 3 of them... I hope your recovery is going well and you're adapting to the twin life and enjoying it too! I found you on babycenter's got twins board, I have two sets (and a singleton). It's a crazy fabulous, miraculous ride!
Posted by: Bella | 02/26/2013 at 06:15 PM